I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food.

 He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself.

A party, loud music, a few drinks, and a superficial conversation with a dear friend. Yet in both of us there's this longing to connect in a much deeper way, on a much deeper level. So why don't we? What holds us back?

 

A wall of words

that mostly serve

to keep me 18 inches from your face.

 

Do you understand my meaning

when I talk of mutual sorrow

(then quickly glance away),

that on this crazy planet

our mutual pain is sometimes

all we hold in common?

 

 

Can you see me like I see you

beyond the mandatory smile,

my well learned social grace

I use to hide all trace

of the frightened little child.

 

But I'm looking past your words tonight

crying out for something we can share,

if only mutual failure, if only mutual fear.

And so I'm letting them go,

letting them drop,

watch them fall from me,

crumble at my feet

(my party masks and theatre casts)

see my image fade

as I move a little closer now

as I give up trying to impress.

 

Hear me talk of pain,

of lonely wars

and wounded friends,

see me as I see you,

just another soldier

in the battle to be free.

 

Let us run together

and scale the wall,

every wall

that makes us fear,

that makes us walk alone,

and even if we fail,

at least we'll fall together

upon this broken earth

where all else just falls apart.